I've been thinking alot about babies lately.....looking forward to adding some branches to the family tree.  I can't wait to gather up some more poses like these--but maybe in color!  I hope Danielle and Monet are feeling well and I wish we could see more of Emily. Don't you like mother and child pictures?

We took Ryan on another college visit this week to Cortland.  He's nearly certain he'd like to be a Red Dragon (that would be a Cortland student) but we still have one school to see.  So of course this got both James and I thinking about our college searches and choices.  It sounds like you had experiences similar to mine.  And by that I mean I was ON MY OWN to figure out college selection.  We absolutely did not get in the car to go visit.  My parents did not get intimately involved with applications, essays, SATs, recommendations and so forth.  Although leaving for that first day was a relatively big deal, I am betting not one of my siblings has a memory of it.  I feel certain Ryan will remember that same day for Amy.

Recently I was reading an article about today's parents in the education process.  The author noted that if  you wanted to know what was missing from someone's childhood, all you had to do was observe their parenting.  Parents try to give their children what they feel they lacked in their own childhood, sometimes with excessive enthusiasm (I think they call it helicopter parenting).  Since I was ON MY OWN to figure out college selection, I guess Ryan benefits from more of my direct attention to his search.  I'm not alone in this and I hope I can be less a helicopter and more a hummingbird (fleeting, gentle and beautiful!).  Lots of parents in a generation act in a similar manner.

My school experience did not often include my parents, even though my Dad was a teacher.  They did not check my homework, attend events or talk to my teachers.  But then again there were several younger siblings needing little things like food, medical attention and haircuts.  So perhaps we are trying to give our children things that we missed in our childhood even if it didn't seem like a big deal at the time. 

So here are mothers and children for you.  Marguerite Coffarelli sadly didn't have enough time with her children when they were young and Mom didn't have enough time with her children period.  But their influence lives on in the generations that follow.

Robert B. Parker died today.  He's one of my favorite authors--creator of one of my very favorite characters Spenser.  I feel like I've lost a member of the family!  There are only a couple of authors whose books I keep on hand always:  Ed McBain (also dead) is another.  I was lucky enough to hear both of them speak about their craft, which was a great joy.  I might go back and start reading his books all over again.  His prose was succinct with the hint of a wink at the inconsistencies of life. 

I kind of imagine a burial ground littered with markers noting all those favorites who were part of our lives. It's the kind of place I can visit and find comfort in.  For me, it's the bookshelf downstairs filled with Ed McBain, Spenser books and Nancy Drew.

Most of us probably have these.  For James I think it's the albums, 33s and 8 tracks.  (Notice I did not mention CDs).  For your dad, his tools and vehicles maybe?  And the music of course.  For your mom, I wonder if it might have been all the cards and notices she kept.  That's just my observation and you all would know better.  It's nice to know "things" can bring comfort sometimes.  Here's to Spenser, 8 tracks, tools and funeral cards!

There's Cold....and there's COLD

2002 Hampton vacation

2009 August at the beach

I guess it's a universal reaction to cold water rushing at you.  Well, maybe "rushing" is an exaggeration.  Anyhow, we are coming off an extended cold spell here in the northeast and Kathleen tells me Florida is starting to warm up again (only a 2 sweater walk on the beach today).  There was sun today and it was above freezing and it felt like a heat wave.  But it's still cold--no mistaking that. 

There's cold such as these ocean waves.  There's cold like winter weather in the northeast.  There's cold like 2 sweater walks on the beach and frostbitten citrus crops. 

And then there's the COLD an immigrant might feel as they wonder if they've made a mistake leaving the homeland and family behind. 

And the unforgiving empty devastating deep dark loss of the Haitians.  So our cold spell doesn't seem so bad and I'm not going to whine about needing a new furnace.  And I'll try to remember this when the price of strawberries doubles or triples in a few weeks.  And be grateful for the sun reflecting off the snow. 

Meant to Be

It's a small world.  A really small world.  My uncle was telling us a story about his dad (my paternal grandfather) and some kind of shooting incident.  I know you don't know my Uncle Tim but sometimes his stories wander a bit  so I don't have better details than that, but apparently my grandfather shot one of his brothers. 

Of course, I couldn't let that go so I started a little research to see what I might find out about any grand-uncles that may have been shot perhaps fatally.  My grandfather Ryan was one of  9 children.  One of his older brothers died rather early so he was my first target (oops--unfortunate choice of words).  I had his date of death so it was pretty easy to send away for a copy of the obituary.  And there was a big surprise in there for me!

As far as I knew, the Ryan boys never wandered too far away from Gloucester Massachusetts, but William Henry Ryan Jr died at his home on Madison Avenue in New York City at the age of 38!  He worked at the Ellis Island immigration station hospital--think about how interesting that must have been.  But the most interesting piece of information came at the end of the obituary--"Uncle Bill" (as I call him now) was buried at St. John's cemetery in Queens. 

St. John's cemetery is also where your great grandmother Catherine Contenta Messa is buried!!  I would never have guessed that one of my Irish ancestors would share a final resting place with your Italians before either James or I were buried.  Maybe it was always meant to be.  How scary is that?

01-01-10

Happy New Year to you all!  Doesn't the date look like some kind of computer code we used to study in Math?  2010 is going to be a big year for the Dalpiaz clan so I am glad it has begun.  I have posted this picture previously but it seemed perfect for today.  I don't know what you all were doing last night--did you have lentil soup for good luck in the new year?  Aunt Josie told me they used to have a bowl of lentil soup before the New Year's Eve meal for good luck.  We did not have lentil soup.  We had take out.  Times have changed.

Happy 35th anniversary to Robert and Bobbie!  Aunt Josie celebrated her 83rd birthday a couple of days ago.  Congratulations.  And Happy Birthday tomorrow to Kathleen.  I'll leave the numbers off this one for now...you're welcome, Kathleen.

Amy is visiting with cousin Lindsay for this New Year.  She was completely happy on a rooftop in Brooklyn last night!  Ryan went ice skating and spent time with his friends.  Today I'm cleaning.  Anyone else out there cleaning like crazy as we clean up from the holidays?  I think that's one thing that hasn't changed very much. 

James and I don't have any particular New Year traditions.  We watched Dick Clark ( James explained who Dick Clark is to Ryan's friends ) last night and were happy to see he seems much improved over last year.  He got the numbers a little mixed up on the countdown, but I don't hold that against him.  Just showing up shows great resolve on his part.

So, good luck with your resolutions if you have them.  Have a relaxing day.  2010 should be great for the Dalpiaz family!